Expectations

I'm a calm day

Becoming a tempest

I'm a rotten tooth

& the world is the dentist

I'm the worst at living life

Like I've got nothing to lose

Because what is death

But another ruse

The reaper

My muse

I like skating by on thin ice

Begging for a break

It's a poetic thing

Wishing for silence

In all the wrong ways

Lack of breath an ecstasy I taste

An exotic nothingness so great

On the edge as I wait

A shadow begging to leave

& explore an expanse

That no living soul has yet seen

Should be explanatory, indeed

I'm not selfish you see

Nor melancholy

Well, maybe maybe that's me

But I revel in the dark

& life misses that mark

Expecting smiles & hugs

Conversation & love

No thank you

Friends & gatherings

Gossip & forced flattering

Oh, how was the weather

I'd love to hear you explain

That we're expecting 4 inches of rain

Give me books & occult

& leave me to dreams

& nightmarish scenes

I expect lack of life to be pleasing

The afterlife you're so gallantly fleeing

I stand begging and pleading

But I shan't forcefully depart

Lest I willingly break hearts

Of all those that I cherish

I expect death is my merit

& duty a precedence to behold

I'll live or die as I'm told

But darling, don't expect me to change

I am who I am

& I'm in love with all the wrong things.

-LaurenAshley